How do I stop binge eating: The Ultimate Guide
- James Hay
- Jan 21
- 13 min read
Updated: Mar 25
Do you ever find yourself feeling out of control with food?
Perhaps you struggle to resist cravings, particularly with those naughty foods that you know you shouldn't eat too much of.
This ultimate guide will show you exactly how to stop binge eating.
How do I stop binge eating might be your first question, but I bet you also want to know how to lose weight as well, right?
How do I stop binge eating without dieting?
Are you sick of struggling with urges to binge on junk food? I know exactly how you feel, because I’ve been there too!
I used to struggle so much with binges, always trying to lose weight and stick to a restrictive diet, whilst secretly overeating and fighting constant hunger urges.
Inevitably, I would get to a point of feeling totally out of control and overwhelmed by the urges to eat, then giving up and going to the shops to buy pizza, ice cream, chocolate and crisps, then eating them all in one sitting.
I remember the stress and frustration as I felt sick and embarrassed at the amount of food I ate, vowing that I would do better and get back on track the next day. Inevitably though, at some point I would break my diet again, with the binges becoming more and more frequent, even daily at its worst.
The good news is that there is a way to stop binge eating and being obsessed with food, and it’s not as complicated as you might think. It’s the exact method that I used to stop binge eating and words can’t express the relief that I now feel at being free from the trap of binge eating.
From applying the steps and techniques of this guide, you will also be free and never have to worry about binge eating again either! In this complete guide, I will firstly explain why you binge, then outline the exact steps of how to stop binge eating.
Why do we binge and how do I stop binge eating?
90% of knowing how to stop binge eating is in understanding why you want to binge in the first place.
When you understand why you want to binge, you can then understand how to overcome it.
Put simply, binge eating is a natural response of your brain to dieting and restrictions. Research supports this, showing that people who diet are up to 18 times more likely to binge!
There are a few main causes of binge eating, which very much overlap but can be addressed separately. These are;
Our brain and its response to dieting;
Restricting foods; and
Feeling disconnected.
(Whilst not necessarily a true cause of binge eating, feeling disconnected from friends, family and your community can also make it harder to stop binge eating.)
So let's dive into how our brain and restricting foods can lead to binge eating, then what to do about it.
How our brain impacts binge eating
So how do I stop binge eating you ask?
First we first have to look at our brain and how it has evolved to keep us alive. Without going into too much depth about how our brains function, there are two relevant parts of the brain for our purposes;
Our relatively recently developed Neomammalian “human” brain, where conscious thoughts reside; and
Our “reptilian” brain, where subconscious thoughts and automatic actions for survival occur.
Both parts of the brain carry out important functions. For example, our human brain lets us consciously make decisions, whilst the reptilian brain does things like breathing without us having to consciously think about it. This is obviously great so that we can sleep and carry on with our day without having to think about breathing!
Our reptilian brains have also adapted and evolved over millions of years to survive things like famines. A landmark study by Prentice et al. showed that when it perceives a lack of food, our reptilian survival brain does two main things to try and conserve as much energy as possible and maintain its current weight;
Make us more hungry; and
Slows our metabolism
Unfortunately, our survival animal brain isn’t able to distinguish between periods of famine and diets, because all it experiences is a lack of food. Over time, as you diet and restrict more, the brain perceives more and more that it is in a time of famine and will make you more and more hungry. Again this is very helpful to survive times of famine, but unhelpful when you are trying to lose weight on a diet.
Our animal survival brain then thinks binge eating is absolutely critical to survival when you diet or restrict, because it perceives that there is a famine. It is automatically responding by igniting extreme hunger cues to try and fill up on as many calories as possible and survive. And until we teach it that we don’t need to binge to survive, we will always struggle against the urge to binge.
It's important to understand here that binge eating is not driven by any deeper emotional reasons. Any thought or habit to binge is simply coming from your reptilian brain and doesn’t mean there is anything wrong with you. Whilst eating because of boredom is definitely a real thing, an urge to binge eat is simply your brain responding to a perceived lack of food. This is great as it means you don’t need to explore any deeper emotional reasons for binge eating.
Whether you respond to urges to binge or not is then up to you, but deeper analysis of why you are having an urge to binge eat is no longer needed. This is quite freeing then as you don’t need to uncover any deeper emotional reasons why you want to eat, your reptilian brain is simply trying to keep you alive. There is nothing wrong with you if you have an urge to binge, your brain is functioning as it should considering lack of food as famine.
Furthermore, remember that studies show that people who diet are up to 18 times more likely to binge. Again this strongly suggests that dieting causes binge eating. There is nothing wrong with you. So rather than trying to fight the urges, it's better to acknowledge and accept the urges as a natural response to a lack of food.
Stop restricting foods to overcome binge eating
Studies show that dieting and restricting also has the unfortunate side effect of increasing the attractiveness of “naughty” foods and treats. This happens because when we restrict certain foods, the effect is that it puts them up on a pedestal. It’s like me saying don’t think of an elephant. What are you thinking of now? I’m sure exactly what I’m also thinking of as I write this! 🐘🐘🐘
So instead of restricting and labelling foods as “naughty”, it’s important to include all foods to remove their extreme appeal. The challenge here is knowing how to include all foods, which I will touch on more later.
Why diets don’t work
Whilst a slowed metabolism isn’t as relevant to binges, it is worth noting that losing weight becomes very difficult as our metabolism slows down. Basically what happens here is that instead of burning fuel at a “normal” rate, the body will store fat to be able to survive in those times of famine/diets. Perhaps you have experienced this yourself, where initially you lose some weight on a diet, only for the losses to stall a few weeks in even though you are still reducing calories.
How to stop binge eating
The answer of how do I stop binge eating really does start with understanding why you binge in the first place. And hopefully you now understand why you have urges to binge eat. once you really understand that binge eating is a natural survival response of your brain to dieting and restrictions, you can follow these three steps to stop binge eating;
Separate your thoughts;
Remove restrictions; and
Create a new habit
Separate your thoughts to stop binge eating
How do I stop binge eating is firstly to recognise that our reptilian brain is separate from our developed human brain. Whereas our reptilian brain might be screaming to binge, our human brain will be resisting this urge. Maybe you've experienced this, where you feel a compulsive need to binge, but at the same time don't want to because you know how it will make you feel afterwards.
Having two competing thoughts in a scientific sense is called "ego-dystonic", and it shows that your reptilian brain is somewhat "separate" to your human brain. Or at the very least, it means that you can choose whether to listen to your reptilian brain or your human brain.
It’s important to note the difference between the survival animal brain that sends the urges and our developed “human” brain, where choice resides. It’s useful to think of urges to binge coming from one brain and resistance to binges coming from a completely separate brain. Again this allows room to choose.
We don’t have to try and reason with our animal survival brain, because we won’t be able to reason with it anyway as it doesn’t understand reason. It runs automatically on needs, whether real or perceived. But what we can do is give it space to be heard.
There is a classic line in negotiation that says if you want to be heard, first make sure the other person knows you are listening. (This works really well in marriage and with kids too by the way, where you first make sure they are really being heard before you try and make them listen. Easier said than done though sometimes!)
The same concept can be applied with our animal survival brain. By not trying to bury the feelings and urges of a binge, you give them space to be heard. Basically instead of trying to ignore the thoughts and urges to binge, we listen to them and make them heard. Then know that these are only thoughts, they are not forcing you to do anything because choice resides in your human brain. Again, the reptilian brain can only send you thoughts and urges to binge, but your separate human brain can always choose whether to binge or not.
Understanding that you can have thoughts from your reptilian brain that you can listen to, but choose to not act on is how to stop binge eating. Conscious actions are decided in the evolved human brain, so you can always choose to not binge, even if your reptilian brain wants you to.
Remove restrictions
Knowing how to stop binge eating also includes removing food restrictions.
Because to completely stop binge eating, you also need to stop restricting foods. As mentioned earlier, restricting and labelling foods as “naughty” or “bad” simply makes them more attractive. To overcome this, you must start allowing all foods.
To apply this, it’s important to know that you can have all foods at any time. So for example, if chocolate is a food that you traditionally binge on, consider that it is probably because you view it as a “bad” or “naughty” food. Yes, foods like chocolate should be a treat. But when you say they are forbidden, that’s when issues can arise and their appeal becomes irresistible.
Maybe you can relate to sitting on the couch at night, binge eating a family block of chocolate or a whole bag of crips to “get rid of it” and try to keep those foods out of the house, vowing to start “clean” the next day. Instead, what I am suggesting is to always have those treats available in the house. Knowing that you can have them at any time removes their power and puts you back in control. Then when you eat some chocolate or other treat, you don’t feel like you need to eat it all to get rid of it, because you know that you can eat some the next day, and the day after that and forever after.
But how do I stop binge eating and remove restrictions without putting on weight you might ask? BecauseI know you might worry here that you need to restrict food to lose weight. But don’t panic, there is a way to lose weight without dieting, restrictions or exercise.
Because I know that as well as learning how to stop binge eating, it’s likely that you also want to learn how to lose weight, which is entirely possible without any restrictions or even counting calories, and I will be happy to show you how to do that too. The quickest and best way for me to show you how to do that is to connect via a quick free call and in that call I can listen to your current personal weight challenges, then share with you a new approach, including a personalised and actionable habit that will help you instantly.
The power of habits
Habits are amazing in how automatic certain actions can become. For example, perhaps you have a habit of brushing your teeth at exactly the same time each day. It’s probably something you don’t even think about anymore, but at some point in life you created and over time cemented that habit.
As well as forming positive habits intentionally, bad habits can also happen without us wanting them to. Whilst binge eating is mostly not created because of bad habits, it can unfortunately become a bad habit because of repetition. However, like any other habit, it can be broken.
It’s a bit like breaking a habit of biting your fingernails. The more you bite your fingernails, the more the habit is reinforced. On the other hand (pun intended), the more you catch yourself biting your fingernails and choose to stop biting them at that moment, the more you are reinforcing the habit of not biting your nails. It’s not about getting upset for feeling like you have failed when you realise you are biting your nails, it’s about taking it as an opportunity to choose to stop biting your nails when you realise you are biting them.
Similarly, when you are in the midst of a binge, there is always a choice. Either listen to your reptilian brain and its urges to binge. Or choose to acknowledge that it is just your reptilian brain that is creating the urge because of its natural survival instincts.
Choosing not to binge eat might be difficult and uncomfortable at first, particularly if like me you have suffered through many binges. But like not biting your nails and any other habit, the more often you use these techniques and don’t binge or stop during a binge, the easier and more automatic it will become to calmly choose whether or not to eat and you will find the urges to binge become more mild and even subside completely.
As well as them becoming stronger and stronger the more we do them, the other great thing about habits is that it doesn’t matter if you miss doing them a few times. The key is to do them more often than not. So the occasional binge has minimal impact if you are resisting your survival urges more often than not over time.
The importance of connection
At its core, binge eating is an addiction. This is because, like any addiction, binge eating is something that many people find compulsive and difficult to stop, even though there are harmful consequences to our body, both in the short term discomfort and longer term effects.
Historically, it was believed that there was a particular chemical or substance that causes an addiction. This is based on an early study which showed that when rats were placed in a cage with access to heroin or cocaine, they would repeatedly and relentlessly ingest the drug until they overdosed and died. However, there are a number of issues with this experiment. The rats were isolated and without anything else to stimulate them, aside from the drug.
A later study questioned whether results would be different by creating a “Rat Park”, where the rats had other rats to interact with, with space to roam and toys to play on. What it found was that although there was the same access to the drugs in Rat Park, the rats preferred to drink water, only occasionally consuming the drugs and never overdosing.
What this later study shows is that the substance itself cannot completely be to blame for the addiction. This makes sense, as there are so many addictions that don’t inherently have any addictive substance. Take gambling, video games, pornography or even online shopping. Yes, the dopamine rush can be addictive, but there is no one substance in any of those that can be described as addictive. What the rat park study then shows is that addiction is largely a result of being or feeling isolated, disconnected and perhaps even without purpose (aside from pushing a lever for more drugs).
More recent studies have also shown incredible results for people who find connection and purpose. For example, studies have shown that community gardening can have a significant impact on reducing rates of addiction. This highlights the importance of community and play.
To apply this in your own life doesn’t mean that you must join a community gardening group. You don’t even need to do anything at all. But if you want to make your journey to stop binge eating easier, and generally enjoy life a bit more, you may find it easier by creating time for a hobby that you love and doing it with someone else. This may be as simple as going for a walk with a friend each week, looking up classes at your local community centre or joining a local sports team.
Basically, the more connection and playfulness you feel in your own life, the easier you will find it to break free from your addiction to binge eating, particularly when combined with the other techniques in this guide.
Putting this all into practice
Whilst understanding why you have urges to binge is fundamentally how to stop binge eating, to put this into practice, here are some simple steps to prevent binges when urges arise;
It’s your choice
The key to following this process is to remove the power from your animal brain and give it back to you, your developed human brain. It doesn’t matter if you then choose to indulge, or even over indulge. The main point is that you are in charge, you choose whether to eat, or not, and you choose what to eat, if anything at all. As you consistently and more often than not choose not to binge, a new habit will form.
You can always choose to listen to your evolved human brain and not binge eat. It may be uncomfortable to not give in to your reptilian urges to binge, particularly at first, but a few things will help;
Remember again that your reptilian brain is basically separate from your human brain
Your reptilian brain is just thinking it needs to binge to survive
Acknowledging your reptilian brain is a really key part of making it heard and therefore quietening it
Allowing all foods will remove “naughty” foods from their pedestal and instead empower you to choose whether or not to eat them
The more you follow the above steps and choose not give in to urges to binge eat, the more you will strengthen your new habit of choosing not to binge eat and weaken your old habit of binge eating.
Lose weight without dieting
Learning the steps to stop binge eating is awesome and it’s such a relief never having to stress about binges again. BUT, what’s even more awesome is knowing not just how to stop binge eating, but also lose weight effortlessly without any restrictions or dieting.
If you are ready to break free from binge eating and also lose weight without dieting for good , then book your free initial call with me now to understand how this could work for you.
—-------- About the author: James Hay
Hi, I’m James, an intuitive eating weight loss coach. I teach people how to lose weight without any dieting or restrictions.
My clients lose weight whilst eating all of their favourite foods.
I’m qualified in Public Health and also a certified nutritionist and health coach. I have personally applied what I teach to lose over 25kg and can help you achieve similar results without dieting. Let’s talk
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